2nd Monthversary

Woke up with loud thunders and lightening this morning. "Rain..", i thought to myself. I like raining days. Without knowing, i stretched my hand across the bed to hug you but you werent there. My eyes opened slowly, and realised how silly i was, you were in camp. You were lying beside me just a few hours before. You liked to pull the blanket over our heads, in the dark. At times we'll wrestle, at times we'll just cuddle. I've always loved the feeling. The feeling of you being beside me.

Reached over for my phone to call you immediately. Didnt even care whether you were driving or you were busy with camp. I just wanted to hear your voice. You laughed at my "grouchy cuz i just woke up" - voice. You always laughed at me. I pout, and you'll laugh again. Sometimes i want to be angry with you, but dammit, i never succeed. You always find a way to make me happy or smile. Boy, you know me best. You always know what to do.

I walked downstairs only to see a letter rested nicely on the table. "To my Grouchy Baboon" - it reads (baboon cuz my face is always red like a baboon's butt, he says). I laughed. "I know this month is quite bad for you with your busy schedule and heavy workload, but baby i just wanna let you know i'm always here for you, so share your sorrows with me, you're no longer alone.." Tears filled my eyes as i continued reading. Tears of happiness, tears of joy, tears of love.

Happy 2nd monthversary baby. I love you.

The voice inside my head.

I wanna let you know that i miss you. I miss our night talks, smses etcetera. Seems like they're getting lesser each day because of my busy schedule and workload. But i'm always looking forward to the weekends, cuz that's when i can finally meet you. I know you'll always be here for me, the words you speak i dont doubt. I know you'll do almost anything for me. "You're always my priority", you say. I know that whenever i feel sad or lonely, you'll rush down just to keep me company. And i know you're always just a phone call away, always willing to answer my calls even if you're already sleeping/tired. I miss you. So very much. Missing you was never easy to handle. Never is, never will.

Sometimes my thoughts run wild, or i might feel alittle lonely without you here physically with me, but at the end of the day, i know that we're never really far apart. For you're always in my heart. ((:

A part, but not apart.

(Proper post below)

Reminder.

Note to self:

"Breathe."

Just motherfucking breathe.

-

So i've come to a decision that i shall skip my Econs CA1 later on. Seriously, i dont know what the fuck is wrong with me. I'm feeling so fucking stressed up, but for fuck? Fuck knows why and i cant remember shit. Let's not talk about memorising, just the thought of flipping through the notes etcetera, makes me want to burn the whole pile straight away. Arghs, frustrates the crap out of me. Fuck Econs, like seriously.

Okay pardon my vulgar-side. Dont get me wrong, i do feel guilty for missing the paper. And my friends arent much of a help either. They're all "Carissa relax", "Carissa dont stress", "Dont give up", "You can do it", etcetera on me. How not to feel guilty? Gah. But going wont do me any good anyway. Waste of time to sit there and feel all shitty and demoralised for an hour or so. So.. catch up on some snooze and head to MDIS awake will be a much better choice, no?

My beloved laptop is back. With everything gone, that is. Sigh. The dude manage to save my tunes but guess what? No titles and all in weird numbers. Which means i have to listen to 2000+ songs and change the titles. Oh my fuck. Pictures, programs etcetera all gone. Sigh.

I'm in desperate need of the weekends. But yet i'm barely even half way through the week. Great or what?

FML.

Econs 101

I really need to study, like now. CA1 tomorrow and i know nuts. Skipped lessons yesterday with the intention to study but failed oh so badly. Need to stop procrastinating and being sucha lazy bum. Not that this CA1 or any exams, as a matter of fact, have anything to do with me anyways. Y'know.. heading to Kaplan and all. It sure does feel like i'm wasting my time in SIM when i can be doing other stuffs much more.. productive. Like my license, for instance, which is on hold for like months already? Damn.

Anyhoo, my laptop bailed on me on the last day of the IT fair. Great. Y'know you're a computer-addict when you go around asking if anyone has a spare laptop and you dont feel at ease without using one. So... now i'm stuck using Allen's laptop for a couple of days. I hope everything will still be intact in my laptop though. If not, music, pictures, notes.. EVERYTHING GONE. Arghs, the agony..

Ha. I realised that i'm more worried about my laptop than my Econs CA1 tomorrow. The computer dude said he would try to bring my beloved back to me today, so i find myself sitting here just waiting and waiting..

Where's my sense of urgency man? Oh well..

REBEL

@ REBEL

That's BB's dog, Casper. Sucha handsome cutie! ^^

I'm heading out soon to meet up with V&N again. It brings back good memories, outings like these. Some things may change, but yet again, feelings/bonds like these never waver. ♥

xx

Would you?

One year one month one day later, 10/10/10, will you still love me?
I hope so, cuz i dont think i'ld ever stop loving you.. ♥

CXJ x Infinity.

Presentation..

My group members!
Kahei, Me, Michelle and Fangqi.







"Omg Michelle, why you so tan?" "Is not i tan, is because im standing beside Carissa, that's why.." Sigh, they keep saying i'm as fair as MJ. )):
Gladys! My cutesy. Lol.

Play spot the difference. ^^


Yes, i jumped in heels.


OMG @ Kahei, he can jump really high.



Group photo!


Huge ass group photo! ((:

Overall, the presentation was a success! Phew. Some of my classmates said i talked a tad too fast, but my lecturer didnt comment on me about that so i guess it was... okay? Hope so. I really hate presentations sometimes. But glad im over and done with it. Still have two projects left. Three to be exact, if im including the one in MDIS anyways. Yea, MDIS cuz i failed a module there that's why i'm still stuck there remoduling. Gah. But it will all be over soon! 3 more weeks! Woohoooooo. I can kiss MDIS goodbye, officially. ^^

Am really gonna miss my SIM classmates. Too bad i wont be staying in SIM for my second dip. Will be heading to Kaplan next year. Arghs, long story. But long story short, was planning to take a degree in SIM after the diploma i'm taking now, but the degree requires me to head over to Swiss for a year. Not planning on going. I'm only taking this dip now cuz it's required for my degree. But since i'm not even going for the degree, that's way i'll drop out of SIM and head over to Kaplan to get an advance dip + degree instead in merely 2 years time. Faster, no? Haha, complicating but everyone is being supportive, so yup.. future all planned out. Work hard people. ((:

xx

One in a million..

Y'know, i'm not the only walking contradiction..

(Phone call)
V says: Eh C, i tell you, we seriously have to cut down on cigarettes.
C says: (I just woke up) Oh.. yea.. okay...
V says: Really. Everyday we're smoking.. it's not good for health y'know?
C says: Okay... yea..
V says: Gimme a minute uh.
THEN this contradicting person said in the background, "Uncle, Viceroy Menthol Light please.." Wtf. Woke me up just to tell me bullshit. @:
V says: Yea hello?
C says: WTF! $#^%&%*^*(&)&

Then, my vulgar word vomit came out. Lol. Okay, though she tell me crap, i still miss her la. We're going shopping. Saw this pair of shoes and i described them to her and she couldnt picture it in her mind. I dont blame her. It takes an artistic person to do so anyways. So.. being sucha nice and kind bestfriend, i drew her the shoe feeling rather.. accomplished. And the very first thing she said was... "what the fuck is that?!"

Great. Tell me, this type of bestfriend, where to find? Truly one in a million..
Lol.

--

*Edited by her one in a million bestfriend, VHO.*
Hi there! I just wanna express my love fo CLAM.
I swear when she gets married, she would have to follow my surname no matter what.

So anyways. She was telling me...




I was being so patient (as usual).. Trying my ultimate best to picture that shoe out..
And this was what I received.



LOL! Thats my very adorable beloved girlfriend.
Very artistic indeed!!!!!

CLAM, I knew that was the shoe, I was to shock to react properly.
Nevertheless. I love you plenty till infinity..

That I would chase away the dark clouds when you're unhappy.
That I would cook instants and not burn your thumb fo you.
That I would pick peas and parsley out of your food.
That I would shelter you with that umbrella during rainy days.
That I would buy you cigarettes when you're upset. (LOL)

*now go grab that tissue and stop tearing after reading my heartfelt words.*


Love you manymany
Fuck you deepdeep

-vho.

Time sure flies..

Gah, the weekends are passing by a tad too quickly. Met BB on Friday for TTW which was awesome! And Saturday as well for some retail therapy. He looks super cute when he shops. Haha. Oh yes! We went to Candy Empire that day, and the moment he stepped foot into the store his face lit up. Like a little kid in his own world. Lol. Poor girlfriend have to help he hold those bags of clothes while he shops for more. Sigh. Lol, kidding. I love to look at him as he wanders around in the store so happily. Wish i can feel the same though. Feel disappointed sometimes. I dont know why i'm kinda losing the "drive" to shop. I guess it comes in handy for my saving plan. But the boyfriend isnt of any help cuz he doesnt want me to save. Pfft.

Okay okay, shall cut him some slack. My poor bb is sick. )): I hope he gets well soon. If not i would've no one to bully or poke. Lol. Get well soon my love! Love you plenty! ^^

Rain rain..

I love rainy days. But only when i'm indoors. I like the smell of rain, dont you? I'm currently in school with this few bunch of people. Project after projects, and presentations. God, i hate presentations. I tend to talk a tad too fast and my words come out like word vomit. I tend to play around with my tongue stud as well. Lol. Bad habits.

One thing good coming out from this presentation is that i can find an excuse to get my Ralph Lauren shirt. MUST.GET.IT! Hiak. I had this urge to shop this morning. But i've to stop spending. Was msn-ing with Gladys for like half an hour thinking whether i should get some stuffs online or not. I'll feel regretful if i dont get it, but on the other hand feel guilty if i do. Wassup with that? Gah. Almost caused us to be late for school again. Lol.

I'm going to catch The Time Traveler's Wife tomorrow with bb. Loved the book and from the looks of the trailer, it looks superb! Psyched psyched psyched! :D

You stole my heart.. You take my breath away..

Sometimes i wish i was a better girlfriend. Hate it when i fuck things up sometimes without even realizing it. You're precious to me. Very. Sometimes.. i wish i never had a past, even though i know you love me for the way i am and who i was. But contradicting enough, i believe everything happens for a reason. Even for my past. I'm always glad to have met you. Right day, right time. Random circumstance? No. But fate. Two roads intertwine.

I know what i want. And that's you. You're everything i want, everything i need. I was a very practical person. I dont believe someone can be another person's life. I dont believe in promises. I hold no expectations. No expectations, no disappointments. "You mean the world to me", is bullshit. But that was because i didnt understand. Until you showed me how love can be so wonderful, so unselfish. I know you do love me even if you dont say it all the time. You really gave me hope, and changed the way i see things. I finally understood how can one person mean so much to another.
It's like.. me standing somewhere waiting, looking out for you. Then you appeared, you stood out from the crowd. You still make me blush, my heart beats faster and you take my breath away. My vision seems blur and only you're clear. It's like you're the only one there. Then you smile.. omg, i melt. It was like the rest of the world evaporated, and you became my world. Happens everytime.

With you, that's the future i want and hope to head and to have. A part of me feels you deserve so much better than me, but i'm just that selfish to let you go. "Fight for your happiness..", they say. And i know i would for you. I'm going to do better baby. I'm not gonna let you down. Darling, wait and see..

So do you want this (you and me, our relationship, our love) for the rest of your life?
I know i do.

Pink Craze.

I dont know why im into pink now. Have a sudden pink craze. Everyone i know is gonna laugh. Im like one of the last person who you'll think likes pink. I never liked pink. Ever. I'm a walking human contradiction. Ha.

Okay, this post is kinda irrelevent. But im bored. What to do? The boyfriend is asleep. Tsk. Chermaine keeps insisting i'm into pink cuz i secretly like pink ranger, totally wtf btw, waiting for J to finish typing his longgggggggggggggg story, and catching up with Fonnis currently. Okay, so i'm not bored bored.. just.. bored. J thinks i'm being retarded/more retarded than usual, and in desperate need to sleep. But i'm not sleepy!

How now brown cow? /:

Glory Glory Man United!

JT says: Ok, we shall see. If manu lose, you'll be sleeping in the living room tonight.
C says: Huh.. ):
JT says: Unless you beg me, say manu sucks, then my room door is open for you. HAHAHAHAH.
C says: NEVERRRRRRR. For MAN U!
JT says: Ok, i go clean my sofa now.
C says: )):

BUT GUESS WHAT?! Haha. Turns out Manchester United vs Arsenal 2-1. Scored by my beloved Rooney and the other was an own goal. Caught the match with BB at his place after catching Final Destination in 3D. Stayed over at his place and i love his room! Super nice. Shall make him sleep in the living room next time and conquer it all to myself! Shall come up with a plan.. Hiak hiak.

Anyhoo, the match was intense! First goal scored was by Arsenal and BB was all psyched and im like "oh fuck!" The last goal scored by them during the last few minutes, was "arghhhhhhs! omg wtf?". But phew, thank god it was an off-side. Haha. Suckers. Manchester United FTW! I even slept in my Man Utd jersey. GLORY GLORY MAN UTD! Ha.

Oh yes. I realise my bf is slowwwww.
JT says: I go download the new Windows Live Messenger. (He was using the old school version)
C says: Lol, you're wols.
JT says: What's wols?
C says: ............ LOL

I think he fell asleep on me again. He can fall asleep in less than 5minutes time, so it doesnt mean i'm boring. It's just that he falls asleep easily. No, i'm not consoling myself and am not in self-denial. Pfft. But i dont deny i love watching him fall asleep. Somehow it captivates me, and i find it.. intriguing. I secretly lie on his chest sometimes just to hear his heartbeat and run my fingers through his hair. I make mini-mohawks and then giggle to myself. Like a retard, he always says. Sometimes he catches me in the act when i look at him in amazement. His blurry eyes looking at me all confused, wondering what's there for me to be staring at for so long. Sometimes, i wish he can see himself through my eyes. Fascinating, amazing, wonderful, intriguing.. ((:

JT says: Seconds seem like minutes, hours seem like days when im not with you..
C says: But im not going anywhere BB. No matter how long. Always gonna be here for you.

xoxo