GoldinUniverse.com

Name: Carissa Lam
Date: 5/31/2009
Colorgenics Number: 14035762

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You are seeking an affectionate relationship, offering fulfilment and happiness. You are capable of powerful emotional enthusiasm. Deep down, you are a kind loving person, always helpful and willing to adapt yourself if necessary to realise the bond of affection that you desire. But you need the same consideration and understanding from others and it is this need that will sometimes hold you back... so let go, trust and you may pleasantly surprised at what happens.

You are experiencing considerable difficulty trying to achieve your goals. As a consequence of this you are becoming more and more irritable. Your friends and acquaintances are finding it increasingly more difficult to appease or to reason with you. You are the cause of your own problems. Don't be so impulsive. It is your vacillation that can lead to problems and uncertainties. Ease up a little.

We are all conditioned by our environment and as such we respond to people's perception of ourselves, but you feel that conditions are not right at this time. You are experiencing certain reservations that are precluding you to develop a particular relationship, business or personal, that is being offered. It is 'make your mind up time' - the decision is all yours, but whatever decision you make, it will be the right one.

You are presently experiencing excessive stress as a result of self-restraint. You act and think differently from the common herd and you want to be liked and admired for yourself and to associate with people who feel and act as you do. Because of this need to be self-reliant and to break away from mediocrity, you are finding this situation most uncomfortable and you are experiencing considerable anxiety - perhaps even more than you feel the capacity to cope with. You need to find a 'soul mate', someone whose standards are as high as your own - but where? Keep on searching... The situation is uncomfortable and you would like to break away from it, but you refuse to compromise with your opinions. You are unable to resolve the situation because you are continually postponing the making of necessary decisions. You are stubborn but this is no deterrent to a happy life, so why drop your standards. Think positively, everything will work out. It has worked out successfully for you in the past and it will again in the future.

The tensions and stresses that you have experienced of late have been the result of trying to cope with conditions which are really beyond your capabilities. You feel completely inadequate to cope with the situation and you would like nothing better to escape from it all and to be able to relax in a problem and pressure free environment where you can do your thing.

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This is so scary! It's so accurate! It's even scarier cuz it doesnt talk about anything in particular, like love, studies, etcetera, but about your life as a whole. And somehow mine talked about love/relationships. Im sucha sucker for romance. Tested and proven.

I told one of my darkest secret to V, K, J and N. Out of everyone in the www (whole wide world), only they know about this. Sorry to have made some of you cry, but im glad i got it off my chest. I didnt dare tell anyone of this before, but i know they are people whom i can rely on. ♥

Nobody but you?

So you know that V and N got the song Gee By Girl's Generation irritatingly stuck in my head? Till now i have no idea why they're so crazy about it but it's irritatingly addictive. And them singing it to me randomly doesnt help a single bit. But anyhoo, there's this other song called Nobody But You by Wondergirls which is supposingly the huge "craze" among alot of people right now and still, irritatingly annoying to me. I for one aint a fan of these kinda songs somehow. But V found a "version" of it that made me laugh. Like totally.
*playlist is at the bottom if you wanna pause the music*

About Swine Flu/H1N1

Mr Brown is awesome. But no one can beat Russel Peters, Nigahiga and Ms Swan! They're awesome-r than awesome. If you've no idea who they are, WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN IN YOUR LIFE MAN! Go youtube them for entertainment. You're sure to be amused.

I know this post is somewhat irrelevant, but what the heck.. My eyes are bailing out on me already, so hit the sheets i must!

Martell Martell
(cuz XO XO haha.)

Let Go.

Everyday feels like a Friday, or a Saturday and a Sunday. I've been getting use to this kinda life. Merely a month more and it's back to the books for me. Surprisingly, something im quite looking forward to actually. Not totally, but yea. Time to adapt back to my studious mode. If i ever had one that is.


My friday was spent..

• working
• @ Great World City. Nothing "great" at all.
• driving the cab driver, J and K crazy with our (me and v) crap. We didnt have to be drunk to get high.
• Sheesha
• 5-10s
• Heart to heart talks (:

Are you as fascinated as i am by V?
more photos in facebook!

Im really amazed by how i've such great friends and family. It's really.. wow. They've seen me through my worse and best moments. Having them is just unbelievable. ((:

Okay, i better get going if not i'll be late! Im going to meet N today and damn im psyched. Been ages since i've last met him. And i really really really miss N loads. You hear me N? Though N is going through NS, he never fails to read my blog or ask me what's been happening in my life. Which really means alot to me.

When a guy constantly smses or calls you, would you be irritated by it or touched by his peserverance? Hmm..

We're in the same room
but living two worlds apart.
I see those teardrops falling from your eyes
But that dont change my mind.
Please dont make things more difficult than they gotta be.
I cant take you anymore.
Everytime i look at you, i see more reason for me to leave you.
And.. im glad i did.

Love.

Watched How I Met Your Mother just now. And damn, i really found the last couple of episodes of season 4 very super meaningful and related to me. Everything happens for a reason. Sometimes, or rather, most of the times, life can be sucha bitch. We go through shit and we'll be like.. "damn, my life sucks." Then we start to ponder about how life could've been if we hadnt have done this, didnt say that etcetera. But i guess from all this "shit", we grow.

My pastor quoted, "a person who grows up in comfort is no match for a person who grows up through adversity..." and how true that is.

Im changing. Im growing. Im not the person whom i use to be, and that's perfectly fine with me. But you dont know me. Im not the girl who i used to be. You're in love with this girl who thought you were her everything then. But the truth is, she's not here anymore. I dont even think you know me, what more to even try and understand me.

When you said you loved me, i just laughed. Dude, you dont know anything about love. If you think this is love, then im sorry, cuz i dont. I have been through my share of joy and heartbreaks, but man, this is not love. Seriously.

"Who are you to talk about love?", you ask. Nobody actually. Im just a sucker for romance just like anyone else i guess. But like i said before, i would really want someone who would be there for me throughout. Not only when he feels like it. And each anniversary, each special occasion would be memorable and happy. We'll be happy cuz we have each other. We dont have to be with each other 24/7, but we want to. Not that we have no life separately, but when you're in love, he becomes part of it. He would mean everything to me, and i would mean everything to him. To have and to hold. And whoever says that "it's only like that during the start of the relationship cuz it's the honeymoon period.." i tell you, fuck you. Fuck you.

What's the point of being together when you know it wont work out? What's the point? I really cannot see it the way you do, really. I really really cant. You say im protecting myself from getting hurt. But is it so wrong? Who are you to judge me, or say anything about me, my choices or my beliefs. You werent there to see me laugh, or cry, or hurt and you certainly didnt see/help me come back up. So let me tell you, you have no fucking right to say i should be with you. Oh wait, the best part. You have no fucking rights to say i should be with you.. when you already have someone else beside you.

Peace.

MANCHESTER UNITED

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/edit @11am

Sadly, they didnt win. But neverthless, they're still the best.

And it has began!

Manchester United FTW baby!

Heehee, both my fav.
Im cutting sleep for this even though i have work later. BUT IT'S WORTH IT!

Goodbye

You know this thing aint been a walk in the park for us.
And i dont wanna see you cry,
but i dont want to have to be the one to tell you a lie..

There's never a right time to say goodbye
But i gotta make the first move cause if i dont you're gonna start hating me..
Cause i really dont feel the way i once felt for you
Boy it's not you, it's me
I kinda gotta figure out what i need

Boy i know your heart is breaking
And a thousand times i found myself asking "Why? Why have i been taking so long to say this?"
But trust me boy, i never meant to crush your world
And i never thought i'ld see the day we'ld grow apart..

Boy i hope you understand what im trying to say
We just cant keep pretending that we get along
How do you not see it?
Listen to your heart, you know we should be apart..
I rather hurt you honestly, then mislead you with a lie..

*

I realised how stupid i was and i wondered why did it take me so long. I was sucha fool. But fuck, im not that girl anymore. Not anymore.

I know that next to you is not where i belong. Your eyes tell a tale of an act of betrayal.

Everything happens for a reason.

Crossed roads but not entwined..

Caught Sky Of Love just now and damn, it was awesome. Im sucha sucker for romantic, sappy movies. To Be With You and The Notebook are also fab movies. All three left me drowning in my own tears. Great.

The thought of traveling to Toa Payoh later for work is insane. Been waking up at 10am almost every single day. V had to bombard my phone with calls and smses. Im so not a morning person. Tested and proven.

This is so unfair. I've to travel to ToaPayoh, Bukit Timah, Tiong Bahru etc for work and not one day is it near the west. This sucks. Im starting to wonder what's the purpose of working actually. I spend my money cabbing to work which is already so expensive. So its kinda like im back to square one. Which sucks.

This is work for us. Having fun. Hadeeha.

V eats very random things randomly. Like just now, she went to get a packet of cheese out of the blue to munch. And she says i'm weird. Geez.

xx

Blind..

I think im moving here for now. Im kinda sick of lj and lazy to delete the rest of my old posts there. But dont remove me people! Cuz i'll still post private posts and all, so add me up in lj if you're interested in reading or whatsoever.

Anyhoo, i had teeth-whitening just now and fuck, it's 10x worse than getting a tattoo, seriously. It's like getting electric shocked over and over again for 2 whole hours. I was trying my best not to scream and fidget too much cuz i've to keep real.. real.. still. My teeth are super sensitive now and it still hurts quite bad. And damn, they even give me a whole list of what to eat and what not to. NO CHILLI, NO TEA, NO ANY SORT OF COLOURED FOOD/DRINKS FOR ONE WEEK! Can you believe it? And yes, there's more..
V and Kris had a good time making fun of me. Ha ha, very funny you guys. Pfft.

Im working with V for EA Games/Sims 3 for this week and next tuesday. Can you believe Sims 3 is launching next tuesday? Psyched! I know it sounds pretty dorky, but the pay is awesome. 10/h. Awesome.

Okay, back to The Nanny > Friends > The Simpsons.

Sup

Sup sup. Im kinda sick of lj right now for.. no apparent reasons i guess. Okay, actually there is a reason. Plurk dont work on livejournal which kinda sucks. This whole"moving" thing isnt official. At least not yet. Im still considering the pros and cons..

Oh well, till then!
C