Hi,
My eyes are killing me right now. Results of having contact lens on for almost 48hours. Ha. I'm kinda tired, but can't get to bed. Too many things on my mind. Maybe it's just me. Had one of those father-to-daughter talks just now. As always, i'm/i was the one making things difficult. I know he's trying his best to be there for me since he pretty much missed a couple of episodes in my life. I know he's making up for it, but sometimes it's just.. weird. Better than before, but yet still a little weird.
Dont get me wrong, i love my dad to the max. But, it's just me. I'm very bad in showing emotions sometimes. Even saying "i love you" or "happy father's day" is just that hard. Had brunch at Merchant Court Hotel with the family. Well, part of it anyways. Heard a family singing "Happy Birthday" to this adorable little boy. Me there, smiling as i see such a joyous scene when my eyes met with my dad's. Guilt, i read. But arghs, i know he's trying. Every event brought us here now, closer. Closer than before at least. So i'm thankful.
"You've no idea how i felt when i saw my own daughter got hurt.. I would always want to protect you.." "No matter what you do, even if you make the biggest mistake of your life, i'll always be here for you.." Sigh. Now i feel bad. I guess sometimes i know he want to be there, but i pushed him away. Hmm familiar. Just like... nevermind.
Am i making any sense to you? Prolly not i guess. Oh well.
-
“ You asked me,
whose life was more important,
yours or mine.
I answered “mine”.
You walked away angry,
not knowing that you are my life. ”
- I love you bb.
